Give and Take

My sisters and I have a joke about who you call a  “friend” and who are just “acquaintances.”

I have had many acquaintances and only a few friends.  I have learned the long and hard way about friendships.  I know that it takes work from both parties to be friends.  You both need to reach out, share in joy and sorrow and think of them when things come up.  Sometimes friends come into your life for a certain reason or event and disappear when they are no longer needed.  Some linger on and then you realize it has been 6 months since your last connection.  They are still in thought and you still love them but you have no idea what is going on in their life nor do you have a clue into theirs.  Facebook has made keeping in touch a little easier but it doesn’t hold that intimacy that a good hug or a good conversation has.

Besides my husband, my best friends are my sisters.  We can talk everyday or once a month and I know that whenever I need them all I have to do is call.  They are the first people I call when I have good and bad news.  They give advice or just listen.  They are my cheerleaders and my biggest critics.

My childhood BFF and I had a falling out about 6 years ago.  I critically judged her by giving her my opinion on her current situation.   A few months later my grandmother passed away and she should have been the first person I should have called.  She was like part of my family growing up.  We did everything together.  But the wounds were too deep, not quite healed.  Facebook got us back on speaking terms but I missed so much of her life.  Her wedding, her struggles with having a baby and all the emotions that come with your life changing and wanting to share it with someone.  We missed out on going through that together.  She moved on and I moved on.  But the memories will not be forgotten.  We have a bond that is like blood.  Memories that can’t be forgotten.

Outside of my family, my best friend is a guy.  We used to work together.  We enjoy eating salads and drinking iced tea.  Going to movies and shopping.  We just enjoy being together.  We used to talk or leave messages for each other everyday.  He has been going through some relationship crap and has withdrawn.  He lives on the east coast and I on the west coast so the time difference has become a challenge.  He’s decided to move to the west coast in November.  I can’t wait!

I think it is important to have friends.  Friendships promote good health and well-being.  The relationship shouldn’t be what’s in it for me but what’s in it for us.

Give and Take.

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One thought on “Give and Take

  1. I wrote about friends today too. Pretty deep thoughts the other night. Can’t imagine life without them. And while I have many ‘friends’ on facebook…I probably can count on 2 hands the ones that I couldn’t live without. You’re at the top of that list and I thank you for that. I appreciate what you give me. And have always given me. No matter what, you’ve always been a constant in my life. Our relationship has never faltered. We’ve never missed a beat. Through the good, bad and ugly…you’ve been right there. I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I’m glad that you are working on relationships during this period of your life. Sometimes, my friends are the only way I get thru the day. Cheers…

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